Real Estate
Recently, my father and I were discussing real estate. Like if Husbandrinka and I ever moved out of the city, where would we go.
The good thing about discussing things with my father is that he will give you a perspective that you have never before considered. Unless you're on mind altering medication.
"Here is how you judge neighborhood," he says. "Go, look. Nice park? Good schools? See neighbors. Then ask 'do I want my daughter pregnant with their sperm?'"
My daughter is 11 years old.
I am moving to Mars. Because intergalactic babies are the adorablest.
The good thing about discussing things with my father is that he will give you a perspective that you have never before considered. Unless you're on mind altering medication.
"Here is how you judge neighborhood," he says. "Go, look. Nice park? Good schools? See neighbors. Then ask 'do I want my daughter pregnant with their sperm?'"
My daughter is 11 years old.
I am moving to Mars. Because intergalactic babies are the adorablest.
Labels: Fun with mama and papa
posted by Marinka at
3:30 PM
26 Comments:
ha. That is so totally so
totally something my gypsie dad would say.
I'm pretty sure how my mom ended up moving us to Parkersburg, Iowa.
Lucky for me, they have good sperm there.
Your father is wrong. No one cares about schools and parks if the sperm is good.
It's their adorable, giant eyes that really make me love alien babies.
Oh you and your family are all hysterical. At first glance I thought your dad was asking himself that question about you! HAHA.
Yes, Mars is the best for baby cuteness, for sure.
BlogHer was worth the price of admition, since I can now see you doing this imitation in my mind...
Time for my nightly "think of Marinka"
toodles.
Wow. Suprised sperm cam third.
When you didn't have a post up earlier today, I almost texted "where r u?" Now I know. You were out evaluating potential new neighborhoods on the basis of their sperm donation desirability.
A perfectly reasonable and useful way to spend a Monday morning, obviously.
Your father should totally have a blog.
Your father should be on Oprah the next time she does a teen sex show. He's a genius.
Smart man. But he forgot to mention checking out the FedEx man and other delivery guys that service that route. Do they resemble my husband enough that I could pass off his baby as my spouse's child?
This is important shit.
It's always about the sperm, isn't it?
Your Dad is hilarious, even when I have to imagine the accent.
Actually, your Dad's perspective sounds very efficient. Like how you seemed to pick Mars so quickly after he said that. You could have agonized over it for months.
Seriously? You want grandkids with no eyelids or noses?
Have you checked out Mars yet? Hmm.. not sure of the quality of sperm there.. and everyone knows that Martians are green. Now Venus... they sow good seed on Venus...
I would love to get our fathers together for a play date one day in Central Park. That would be all kinds of awesome.
My real estate agent said roughly the same thing. When we drove into one neighborhood there was a couple teenage girls walking in the cul-de-sac to which he added, "This looks like a great place."
He has a point.
And wisdom.
And good drugs...
Well shit! Why didn't you share that advice before!? It's probably too late for my daughter now.... :o)
Very informational since we are looking at houses and THANK GOD I have a son.
Wow.
Your dad is hilarious! And I think he's got a point. Which is why, when my oldest turns 13, I will move to the middle of the countryside, right next door to a convent. It might kill me, but at least I won't have to put a microchip in her neck.
How much do you suppose convents are on Mars?
GREAT advice. He should go into real estate.
He hit all the most important factors to consider. I'm going to remember that next time we move.
Ahhh, fathers...
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