Sunday, August 30, 2009

Here We Go Again

My son has been invited to spend winter vacation with his friend, in Boca. Yes, my 8 year old will be pool-side, sipping Mai Tais, playing mah jongg, and dancing in a grass skirt, while I shovel snow in New York City, racked with swine flu, with nary an Entenmann's cake to be found for healing purposes.

(Yes, I am aware that I've cast a 60 year old woman in the role of my son. It's called comedic-poetic license. And it's totally legal. )

I mention this unfairness to Husbandrinka and he's like, "whatever. Let him have fun."
And I'm totally not against my children having fun, except when it means that I'm not having fun because (1) I am super worried about their having fun or (2) I am Left Behind, a la End of Times, except in New York City.

Besides, what Husbandrinka seems to have totally forgotten is that for years I lived with my super cute Basset Hound, Mavis, who had standing weekend invitations to the Hamptons and several upstate destinations.

Yes, people would invite my dog over for the weekend. Because apparently she was scintillating company.

"Is Mavis available?" they would ask.
"It just so happens that we're both free!" I'd surprise them with the good news, in case they were too shy to come out and invite me along.
"Great! I'll have Mavis picked up Friday morning. We want to get beat the traffic to Southampton."

So, I would sit at home, rotting in the NYC heat, breathing in life-endangering pollution, while Mavis was probably getting exfoliated on the beach.

It's a good thing that I have such a big heart, because many others would be totally bitter. And no one likes to have a bitter person along for the weekend. Or on vacation. In sunny Florida.

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Blogger the mama bird diaries said...

My husband has about 400 relatives in Boca. You are welcome to stay with any of them.

August 31, 2009 at 12:56 AM  
Blogger Sophie said...

YOU, my dear Marinka, are a saint. People probably don't invite you over just because they know how dry and flat and boring NYC would be if you left it.

August 31, 2009 at 2:00 AM  
Blogger Kabbalah Rookie said...

You need to improve your skills of inviting yourself.
When they invited your son, you could have responded "we'd love that! how very generous of you!" and then ignored any of their attempts to reverse their kind offer...
Or you could chain yourself to him on the morning of departure.

August 31, 2009 at 4:30 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

There is luggage that is large enough to pack a body in. Just a thought. And they have wheels. It might be god for Ladrinka to work up his arm muscles prior to the vacation.

August 31, 2009 at 6:15 AM  
Blogger jen said...

you could mention that he's really REALLY attached to the ashes of your deceased dog. and he can't go anywhere without them.
unless he has his mommy to lean on for support.
might work.
some people aren't very comfortable with the idea of traveling with a deceased pet.

August 31, 2009 at 6:46 AM  
Blogger CSY said...

Hey! Even if that inviting yourself vacation doesn't happen...I live in sunny ass hot Florida too! You're more than welcome to come here while he's in boca...

August 31, 2009 at 9:17 AM  
Blogger Comedy Goddess said...

I met Mavis at a cookout last weekend in Southampton.
She makes the best Mojitos!
She said you taught her? Kudos!

August 31, 2009 at 11:22 AM  
Blogger phd in yogurtry said...

They don't invite you because they're afraid they'll interrupt the flow of your creative blog posts.

August 31, 2009 at 2:47 PM  
Blogger Loukia said...

Hmm. I'd be totally wanting to go with, too! As if you have to be stuck at home, in the dreadful winter, who he's off having fun in the hot sun! ;) No fair! (Really, I'd be complaining about this if I were in your shoes!)

August 31, 2009 at 2:59 PM  
Blogger S3XinthePantry said...

I know, I hate when my kiddos leave and it is finally VACATION sleep-in snuggle time. And you're going to lose a snow shoveler too.
But, I bet he's excited!

My first time here - love your blog!

August 31, 2009 at 3:54 PM  
Blogger Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Everyone always wanted to take my son on super cool vacations too. So not fair. I feel your pain. Tell him no and make him shovel. Maybe buy him an Entenman's cake to make up for it. Or not.

August 31, 2009 at 3:57 PM  
Blogger Liza said...

My parents live in Boca too and we go visit them every year in Jan or Feb. You are welcome to come with us and I will leave my hubby home, lol. You're a hell of a lot funnier and probably way more fun to hang out with! LOL

August 31, 2009 at 4:15 PM  
Blogger Mwa said...

You know, we could house-swap. I would be willing to sacrifice myself. I spend some of my winter in dreary New York City while you spend some of yours in exciting Belgium. What do you think?

September 1, 2009 at 7:27 AM  
Blogger ♥ Braja said...

Florida?? Take a gun....

September 1, 2009 at 9:37 AM  
Blogger Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

No one goes to Florida anymore... aren't there boa contrictors there? I've seen Anaconda... I would rather be in NYC.

September 1, 2009 at 11:41 AM  
Blogger Anna See said...

I'd be bitter, too. Kind of reminds me of when my friends got to go meet Amy Carter at the White House, only different.

September 1, 2009 at 4:14 PM  

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