I love daytime television and Barack Obama! And also, I have my period

If there is anything that I love more than daytime television--from Oprah to Jerry Springer to The Price is Right to General Hospital, I don't know what it is. A perfect day is spent watching all of that. And reading articles about Barack Obama, who is a wonderful man and an inspiring leader. I am so happy that I voted for him, even though I supported Hillary Clinton in the primaries. And also I am getting my period soon. The rest of this post will describe all these events in detail and also provide makeup tips. Hopefully my family members have stopped reading at this point and are busy dialing mental health facilities for intervention, so I am going to switch gears a bit and tell you that yesterday, during Christmas dinner, my father scared the shit out of me by telling me that he is considering opening up a cat shelter where he would take in and care for homeless cats. The best part about it was that he said this in Russian, so my kids, husband and in-laws were clueless about what he said and why I was self-administering the Heimlich. Don't get me wrong, cats are good. But my father has severe allergies to cats, so this plan to take in, oh, a hundred of them, has Dr. Kevorkian written all over it. Is my father trying to end it all? Is this a scream for help? For some strange reason when I posed these questions to him, he seemed taken a back. Apparently, and secretly, his lifelong dream has been to help homeless cats. Please pray for us. Because if my father becomes one of those cat hoarders, you'll be begging me to blog about my period instead of the cats.

And that's why Barack Obama was my candidate and why General Hospital is the best soap ever!